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Soosh’ Blog » 2006» October

10.27.06

Pete?

Posted in Curacao at 11:20 am by Soosh

Ik kwam nog een leuk plaatje tegen op funny.com:

Liefs
Soosh

10.22.06

Tegen de verveling

Posted in Curacao at 11:33 pm by Soosh

Wat ga je doen als je op kantoor zit en er is niet zoveel te doen? Dan ga je leuk beetje rondsurfen en kom je soms de mafste dingen tegen. Dit vond ik op funny.com en vond ik ook daadwerkelijk grappig:

Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems, known as “squawks,” submitted by QUANTAS pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way Quantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.

P = The problem logged by the pilot.
S = The solution and action taken by the engineers.

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
S: Autoland not installed on this aircraft.

P: No. 2 propeller seeping prop fluid.
S: No. 2 propeller seepage normal. Nos. 1, 3 and 4 propellers lack normal seepage.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on backorder.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200-fpm descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That’s what they’re there for!

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windscreen.
S: Suspect you’re right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with words.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

Liefs
Soosh

10.19.06

I’m gonna be a bear.

Posted in Curacao at 10:29 pm by Soosh

In this life I’m a woman. In my next life, I’d like to come back as a bear. When you’re a bear, you get to hibernate. You do nothing but sleep for six months. I could deal with that.

Before you hibernate, you’re supposed to eat yourself stupid. I could deal with that too.

When you’re a girl bear, you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you’re sleeping and wake to partially grown, cute, cuddly cubs. I could definitely deal with that.

If you’re mama bear, everyone knows you mean business. You swat anyone who bothers your cubs. If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too. I could deal with that.

If you’re a bear, your mate -expects- you to wake up growling. He -expects- that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.

Yup, i’m gonna be a bear!

Soosh

10.12.06

Deken der Ontkenning

Posted in Curacao at 10:21 pm by Soosh

De heimwee begint weer te vreten. Ik wil naar huis, terug naar m’n vrienden, familie en m’n poezen. Terug naar mijn eigen huis, in mijn eigen stad, in mijn eigen landje. Over het algemeen weet ik nog me nog redelijk te handhaven onder de warme fluffy deken der ontkenning, maar helaas wordt soms met grof geweld de warme fluffy deken weggetrokken. En daar zit je dan, zonder deken, terwijl de ijzige kilheid van heimwee tot diep in je botten doordringt. Heimwee in al zijn uglyness.
Het zal ongetwijfeld een tijdje duren voor dit weer wegtrekt. Het enige wat ik kan doen is zorgen voor zoveel mogelijk afleiding, in de hoop dat ik in ieder geval Nederland niet zo mis en wie weet Curacao weer een beetje leuk ga vinden. Momenteel denk ik; ‘yeah right’, maar ik weet ook dat op een of andere manier het allemaal weer goed gaat komen. En voor wie m’n deken heeft gejat; fuck you!

Soosh